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My Vagina is Producing Cheese!!!!

Image: Pinterest

I've had an otherwise healthy-no-issue vagina well until 2019 when I had my first yeast infection. Now to start off, by virtue of being a woman you are more likely to have a yeast infection at some point in your life. For men, thanks to their anatomy, most of them don't get it. In case of an infection, the symptoms can go unnoticeable.  Women, by design, have the perfect ground for those opportunistic fungal buggers to make a factory out of our vagina.

I remember how panicked I was. We all know that as adults, anything concerning reproductive organs is bound to scare the shit out of us. That is the exact feeling I had. I was like what if in addition to a yeast infection I had HIV and STI's? Weeh!!... I googled stuff and we all know how google says we should have died yesterday. Eiih!! It is never a good idea to google your symptoms.

In my state of panic I texted my sister, my cousin and a friend. I was just buying time because I was hoping it would go away on its own. Also there is nothing more embarrassing than telling the doctor that you feel like there are safari ants up your coochie. Some of them have terrible bedside manners and treat you like you are some bottom of the barrel degenerate. But some doctors though. Aiihh!!. Anyway my cousin told me I should go to the doctor because it would get more uncomfortable than it was. My sister just said "Mimi sijawai shikwa na hizo vitu. Enda kwa daktari tu". What a way to comfort me😂😂.

The itchiness of yeast infections is more like that of chicken pox. During the day the day it's tolerable because you're active. But at night dear God!!!! You can't sleep. You feel like scratching the itch but you can't because your vulva is already so inflamed and your vagina is burning. You can feel the discharge(which looks like cheese) coming out. Heeeh maah!!. The only saving grace with yeast infections is that the cream to white coloured discharge is odourless. If your discharge is foul smelling you better get checked for a bacterial infection.

So I went to the doctor. Thank God she was kind. She was like, "We are going to need a urine sample and we'll also do a VDRL Test." The urine test didnt bother me. As for the VDRL I was like, "Hold on. Why the hell would they do a damned Syphillis test?" I'm sure she had no idea that I knew about the test. You don't do a course in Biotechnology and not know the various lab tests. I was too tired to start asking questions though. Usually, I always ask what a test is for if I have no idea. It is always good to ask. The VDRL test came out negative of course. They just wanted to eat my money. Damned Kenyan hospitals. The yeast infection was confirmed however.

I was prescribed Clotrimazole pessaries. Pessaries are tablets inserted to the vagina. Heeeh!!! Tablets to the vagina tena!! I was expecting an injection or oral tablets. I remember the chemist showing me how to use the applicator to insert the tablet and I was wishing the ground would just open up. The applicator is a plastic intended to help you push the tablet up your vagina. Now, I have a fear of inserting a tampon which is made of cotton. How about a plastic with rough edges? I tried using that plastic and my vaginal muscles refused to relax. I resorted to using my fingers. In any case I did my research and found out that it is okay to use fingers. 


This is an image of the applicator🤧😑

By the second day of using the tablets I was feeling like my healthy self again. Pheeww!!! It was such a relief when I was over and done with my prescription. Being healthy is something some us underrate by the way. Health is really wealth.

To ladies, yeast infections are so very common. It's not something to be embarrassed or worried about really. It is not classified as an STI but you can get it through sex(oral sex included). You can also get it if you are pregnant, using hormonal contraceptives or using antibiotics to treat some infections especially UTI's. You can also get it if you have diabetes or if you have a weakened immune system especially due to HIV. If the infection keeps on recurring you better just go the doctor for a full work up. Better yet, you can go read on how to prevent yeast infections.

My intention is to make you ladies aware that you shouldn't be comfortable with being uncomfortable. Your vagina shouldn't be fussy. It shouldn't be giving you headache.  It's good to know everything that pertains to its health and wellness and that means you got to have knowledge on the various infections associated with your reproductive organs. Beat the embarrassment!!


P.S I still don't mind cheese, THE DAIRY PRODUCT!!😂😂😂

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