I just learnt the other day that fingers don't have muscles. Like the movement of fingers comes all the way from the forearm. I mean how cool is that? Same principle applies to the toes. We never really stop learning don't we?
I have been looking at my fingers differently in a cool way ever since. It just got me thinking as to how we look at life differently when we get to experience certain things. You just realize that there is no one way that life goes. There is no one way to reach to where we want to be. There is no one way to handle certain things. The knowledge you use now won't necessarily be the knowledge you'll use later.
For example I can't picture myself taking my kids to a boarding primary school. I've been there. My experience was not that great. I missed my parents. I missed being carefree because that school was very limiting. I feel like I missed a huge chunk of my childhood and I can't imagine doing that to any of my children. I did come out more responsible but it was nothing my own mother couldn't teach me.
A whole lot of things become clear as you get older. You'll just be in a car staring out the window looking at the trees fly. You'll take a breathe and have an epiphany. Everthing and nothing will make sense at first but it will be a welcome confusion. When that 'nothing' starts making sense you'll find yourself smiling.
It will feel good to not know much because nobody knows much anyway. It will click that life does not happen in a straight line. Life is one big confused mess. As you welcome the feathery touch of an epiphany, you'll feel all the pressure of career, societal and other life expectations fade. The road ahead won't seem so blurry.
Take another example of having a best friend. Even after I wrote about the kind of friend I am and saying that I'll unravel, I still felt this anxiety of having the necessity of having one. In my mind, I still didn't understand the true dynamic of who a best friend is. It wasn't until I saw a certain tweet that the anxiety went away.
The tweet was about this girl who was asked who her best friend was. She said, "I don't know. I don't use that language anymore. It doesn't fit. I have friends that hold the key to different doors of my personality. And some open my heart. Some my laughter. Some my sin. Some my civic urgency." After reading that I was like ohh damn hell!!! That has been me all this time. And I felt okay. Such are some of the things which will come clear.
There is also the matter of being the bigger person. As we grow, we meet people who always say you have to be the bigger person. Like someone disrespects you and you're told be the bigger person and let it go. That Karma is a b**ch and what comes around goes around.
Well that is a whole lot of BS. I find being a bigger person translates to being a doormat sometimes. You aren't a doormat. You are human being with feelings. If you get hurt, communicate. Call people out on their shit. Spew lava and turn stones. Be the damned Karma and the go around. Then close that chapter and let it go.
Another thing: Boundaries. You grow and you realize you are actually in control of who you let in. I'm sure most of us have felt the pressure to always ensure you fit. We've hidden our awkwardness, our gifts and our energies so that we come out as acceptable. The result of that is people crossing boundaries and you feeling like a helpless being.
Let me tell you something. Set those boundaries. Set those boundaries with your family and friends and anybody you interact with. Set those boundaries and watch people adjust. Sure you might lose a bunch of friends but you will find others. True friends will always roll with you no matter what. Sure some of your annoying family members might hate on you start calling you names because you stopped being the never-ending ATM machine but you will feel peace and take control of your own life.
The best thing about this confusion of growing up and realizing that life takes different turns is that you can actually stop where you are and go back to find another way. You can change careers. You can quit exhausting jobs. You can stop entertaining people who bring no value. You can tell when someone is guilt tripping you and you'll outmaneuever that someone. You'll feel good about going about with life with uneeded worry. You will be more open to what life throws at you. And you know what? You will be just fine.
This post looks here and there and everywhere but heey, that is life. It is here and there and everywhere.
Have a lovely week.
Truddie loves and appreciates you.
❤
I have been looking at my fingers differently in a cool way ever since. It just got me thinking as to how we look at life differently when we get to experience certain things. You just realize that there is no one way that life goes. There is no one way to reach to where we want to be. There is no one way to handle certain things. The knowledge you use now won't necessarily be the knowledge you'll use later.
For example I can't picture myself taking my kids to a boarding primary school. I've been there. My experience was not that great. I missed my parents. I missed being carefree because that school was very limiting. I feel like I missed a huge chunk of my childhood and I can't imagine doing that to any of my children. I did come out more responsible but it was nothing my own mother couldn't teach me.
A whole lot of things become clear as you get older. You'll just be in a car staring out the window looking at the trees fly. You'll take a breathe and have an epiphany. Everthing and nothing will make sense at first but it will be a welcome confusion. When that 'nothing' starts making sense you'll find yourself smiling.
It will feel good to not know much because nobody knows much anyway. It will click that life does not happen in a straight line. Life is one big confused mess. As you welcome the feathery touch of an epiphany, you'll feel all the pressure of career, societal and other life expectations fade. The road ahead won't seem so blurry.
Take another example of having a best friend. Even after I wrote about the kind of friend I am and saying that I'll unravel, I still felt this anxiety of having the necessity of having one. In my mind, I still didn't understand the true dynamic of who a best friend is. It wasn't until I saw a certain tweet that the anxiety went away.
The tweet was about this girl who was asked who her best friend was. She said, "I don't know. I don't use that language anymore. It doesn't fit. I have friends that hold the key to different doors of my personality. And some open my heart. Some my laughter. Some my sin. Some my civic urgency." After reading that I was like ohh damn hell!!! That has been me all this time. And I felt okay. Such are some of the things which will come clear.
There is also the matter of being the bigger person. As we grow, we meet people who always say you have to be the bigger person. Like someone disrespects you and you're told be the bigger person and let it go. That Karma is a b**ch and what comes around goes around.
Well that is a whole lot of BS. I find being a bigger person translates to being a doormat sometimes. You aren't a doormat. You are human being with feelings. If you get hurt, communicate. Call people out on their shit. Spew lava and turn stones. Be the damned Karma and the go around. Then close that chapter and let it go.
Another thing: Boundaries. You grow and you realize you are actually in control of who you let in. I'm sure most of us have felt the pressure to always ensure you fit. We've hidden our awkwardness, our gifts and our energies so that we come out as acceptable. The result of that is people crossing boundaries and you feeling like a helpless being.
Let me tell you something. Set those boundaries. Set those boundaries with your family and friends and anybody you interact with. Set those boundaries and watch people adjust. Sure you might lose a bunch of friends but you will find others. True friends will always roll with you no matter what. Sure some of your annoying family members might hate on you start calling you names because you stopped being the never-ending ATM machine but you will feel peace and take control of your own life.
The best thing about this confusion of growing up and realizing that life takes different turns is that you can actually stop where you are and go back to find another way. You can change careers. You can quit exhausting jobs. You can stop entertaining people who bring no value. You can tell when someone is guilt tripping you and you'll outmaneuever that someone. You'll feel good about going about with life with uneeded worry. You will be more open to what life throws at you. And you know what? You will be just fine.
This post looks here and there and everywhere but heey, that is life. It is here and there and everywhere.
Have a lovely week.
Truddie loves and appreciates you.
❤
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